Army Secretary Daniel Driscoll vowed this morning that “organizational acquisition reform” is on the horizon, promising to adopt a “Silicon Valley” approach to tools, tech and weapons can get into the hands of soldiers quicker than the traditional way of doing business. “After seeing the power of combining venture capital money and mentorship with startup culture, I can say unequivocally that the Silicon Valley approach is absolutely ideal for the Army,” Driscoll said, according to prepared remarks.

words uttered by the utterly deranged

“It will identify promising startups, quickly fund them and get minimally viable products to soldiers in weeks,” he later added. The secretary’s comments come after the service announced the FUZE initiative last month — a venture capital-like acquisition model designed to speed up the private development of emerging technologies for later use by soldiers. The program aims to invest $750 million over the next year and, as Driscoll announced this morning, it will increase to $765 million the next year.

“That’s an over 150 percent increase in the Army’s funding towards emerging tech and innovation,” he said. Driscoll announced the first FUZE competition, called xTechDisrupt

we have to outlaw tech and VC guys from being able to name things

and “powered by” Silicon Valley startup accelerator Y Combinator, would start “right here at AUSA.” “Like Shark Tank, contestants will make a product pitch for $500,000, then sprint for 30 days to launch their breakthrough tech,” he said. Driscoll, like other key Pentagon appointees, hails from the private equity and venture capital worlds, with previous jobs that include chief operating officer of the $200 million Flex Capital VC fund.

critical support to private equity and venture capital in their valiant struggle to destroy the United States from within

The point of this new acquisition model is to break down barriers, Driscoll said, emphasizing that the current way the Army operates has “lined the primes’ pockets for so long.”

now we’re gonna line even more guys’ pockets! such innovation!

The line echoed previous eyebrow-raising comments Driscoll made in May when he said he would consider it a “success” if he sees a prime defense contractor die on his watch. Driscoll argued this morning that primes contribute to the “12-18 month contracting cycle” that prohibits the service from providing weapons and tech to the warfighter at at the speed that is necessary. Simultaneously, this morning Driscoll teased an upcoming acquisition shakeup at which the Army has been nodding for several months. “Our acquisitions enterprise is more complicated than it should be, and that’s getting in the way of empowering soldiers. So, we will combine it all under a single organization that reports directly to senior Army leadership,” Driscoll said. “We want simple, fast, and efficient. We want to get soldiers the tools they need now, not a decade in the future. We will break down barriers until we measure acquisitions not in years and billions, but months and thousands.”

y’know what you could do to strategically-vital industrial companies that don’t meet results? nationalize them, that way you can even keep their manufacturing capacity and use it better instead of just scattering it to the winds and hoping small business entrepreneurs somehow manage to replace it!