former bed side nurse here on sick leave till the end of the month. I should start my new job away from patients with normal working hours on October 1st.
I feel drained, even though I eat and sleep well, the best I’ve slept in months, my circadian rhythm is that of a normal human being, I can cook, go shopping, I even play some hobbies now.
Nobody yells at me or makes passive aggressive or backhanded remarks for me to hear.
The 1st. of October is a week away and I don’t believe I’ll be a fully functioning human being by then, most probably I’ll ask for a 2 week sick leave extension.
what worked for you to go back to your normal self?
It will take a year or so to recover.
Don’t give a fuck attitude going forward is a must.
You are trading time for money. Nothing else.
Allow yourself to get bored so you can start doing hobbies again
I’m gonna have to ask you to explain here:
I stopped giving a fuck about my coworkers 2 weeks before calling in sick, like, fuck them and I hope they burn in hell. If I ever have to set foot at that god forsaken piece of shit ward I’m calling in sick again. Fuck em.
I also don’t give a fuck about any of my former managers.
I don’t want to to say I don’t give a flying fuck about my current hospital, because I’m staying with them on a different role until I find something better, which may or may not happen, but it’s a clock in clock out and I’m fucking done with you and fuck you asshole situation
you suggest not giving a fuck even going forward? but I do need to give a fuck not to lose my new position until I have secured a newer one, right? I don’t even know if I’m going to hate the new position away from patients as much as the ward.
you other 3 bullet points are great though
Give a fuck while you’re on the property and don’t give them any space in your mind, heart or soul when you’re gone.
That said, fuck them, hope they burn in hell is the opposite of not giving a fuck since they still get that attention or energy from you. Try to think of them as little as possible and give them as little emotional energy as possible when you do think of them.
you are right, but somehow I cannot stop ruminating about this. Just thinking about them and how I was treated infuriates me.
I’m sorry but this attitude is greatly contributing to your burnout for sure. Carrying this much anger isn’t healthy, and it wears on you.
I wouldn’t say you “don’t give a fuck about them”, because if you didn’t you wouldn’t hate them and despise them so much. You wouldn’t even have a second thought about them.
You’ve got to address those feelings first.
I don’t know if this is PTSD, but the mere mention of their names and remembering them infuriates me.
I know I should be better than this and leave the past behind me, but somehow I cannot.
At least I’m eating and resting well
Seperate your mental state from your job.
Obviously do your job as required but bare minimum. Don’t get emotionally entangled with coworkers and subjects.
They are all NPCs, not real people, that’s how corporate world operates.
That also means the flip side… Zero animosity, just business. Nothing personal. It takes practice but once you get there. All that shit just slides off like tefflon.
People won’t like you for it but you won’t care.
Like I said, it will take a year. But first step is to acknowledge how inhumane these conditions are.
actually, some unidentified coworkers complained I’m not friendly and the way I speak is demanding.
My former supervisor seemed to care about this because she came to me with these accusations, repeatedly. I still don’t know if this something big enough to fire somebody.
I don’t care, don’t give a fuck but apparently hr does…
god forbid she had to her job of managing. not your problem. it is not your job o make these people like you. your job is to do your job. with that being said, don’t expect favours. people will want blood. doing bare min, legally required is your defense on that.
just don’t give them any vector of attack. remember time for money. do enough to earn your salary, the rest can get fucked.
go home, enjoy time with loved ones, take care of yourself. this system is designed exploit you and the normie NPCs are just that. let them ruin their lives over a shiti pay check.
control your consumption and stack cash, labour will not set you free. cash money will tho