It was just after 1am on a warm summer morning. My wife was told after 25 hours of labor she was going to need an emergency C-section. We were terrified as baby’s heart rate kept dropping in and out of normal range all labor and he was struggling to move down the canal.
Nurse: Dad, this is the time to get your phone out and take babies first photo!
Me: She’s not talking to me. I’m not a father. I’m not even sure what I am…
Nurse: This is it! Time to see if it’s a boy or girl!
Me: Oh it’s a boy we found out with the ultrasounds
Nurse: Are you sure? Those aren’t always accurate. You never know! Nope, definitely a boy…
My son was born and I spent the first hour of his life alone as my wife had complications after the c section. We did skin to skin, him on my chest… Cue identity crisis.
Months of not grasping the concept of how I could be a father. Why did I feel more connected to the idea of being a mother. I googled “how to know I’m trans” and came across the Gender Dysphoria Bible that smashed my egg wide open at the tender age of 29
We are actually! Thank you. Our marriage is stronger than ever :) years of lying to myself meant lying to my wife which put a real strain on our relationship. We both didn’t think I was going to live for more than a few years with how bad my mental health got.
Now we are strong, connected and determined to keep moving forward. ❤️
It was just after 1am on a warm summer morning. My wife was told after 25 hours of labor she was going to need an emergency C-section. We were terrified as baby’s heart rate kept dropping in and out of normal range all labor and he was struggling to move down the canal.
Nurse: Dad, this is the time to get your phone out and take babies first photo!
Me: She’s not talking to me. I’m not a father. I’m not even sure what I am…
Nurse: This is it! Time to see if it’s a boy or girl!
Me: Oh it’s a boy we found out with the ultrasounds
Nurse: Are you sure? Those aren’t always accurate. You never know! Nope, definitely a boy…
My son was born and I spent the first hour of his life alone as my wife had complications after the c section. We did skin to skin, him on my chest… Cue identity crisis.
Months of not grasping the concept of how I could be a father. Why did I feel more connected to the idea of being a mother. I googled “how to know I’m trans” and came across the Gender Dysphoria Bible that smashed my egg wide open at the tender age of 29
Woah, thats… Thats quite the story! I hope you and your wife are doing alright!
We are actually! Thank you. Our marriage is stronger than ever :) years of lying to myself meant lying to my wife which put a real strain on our relationship. We both didn’t think I was going to live for more than a few years with how bad my mental health got.
Now we are strong, connected and determined to keep moving forward. ❤️