I always love stories about Hitler’s final days: yelling in paranoia, demanding more drugs, constantly shitting himself and fouling up every room, in excruciating pain, smelling like he was rotting from the inside out. And these are from reports of those close to him.
I wish he had been captured, I’d love to read descriptions from his captors
He’s a great father!
Sincerely,
Adrian Dittman
That’s a great idea! Exactly, you get the gist
“As a person with a strong track record of criticizing Elon Musk, I feel extremely confident asserting that this was not a Nazi salute. Elon Musk is a friend to the Jews,” Newsweek opinion editor Batya Ungar-Sargon insisted. “This is a man with Aspergers exuberantly throwing his heart to the crowd. We don’t need to invent outrage.”
Don’t you [Batya Ungar-Sargon] DARE turn this into some neurodivergent slip-up. He’s a fucking Nazi, you’re a fucking Nazi-apologist, and I hope you both suffocate inside your own assholes.
Keep spending most our lives in a techno-gangster paradise
I used to help out my grandparents and their friends with stuff. My grandparents always insisted on paying me and sometimes their friends would pay me too.
At first, I’d refuse until they told me that it makes them feel bad. So, I’d gladly take their money and save it in an envelope. Then, when something would break or need to be replaced, I’d say, “oh, I have an extra one of those! Gimme a couple of days to look for it.” And then I’d buy it with the money they gave me.
My wife and I would also take my grandparents out to dinner using the money they paid me, or I’d buy groceries and cook them a few meals, but tell them that I accidentally made extras.
Unless she’s paying you way too much, just take the money and then use it to fund helping her.
In 3 years, some green-energy country is going to invade the sandy dust-bowl North American continent to use our land for wind, solar, and algae-based bio-fuels. We might fight at first, but we’ll be too fat or sick or both to actually do anything about it.
When we finally emerge from our state of extreme foot-shootery, we’ll look around and realize what’s happened: American exceptionalism has won the day again! And then we’ll invade some country with oil and talk about how smart and rich we are.
That’s what I tell myself when anyone asks me if I know what my next phone is gonna be.
Not to sound like one of those “All Lives Matter” assholes, but I think we can agree that all rapists should be named, shamed, and sent to an island with only cacti and porcupines.
But an important difference between DJT and BAT is that one of them is now the fucking president. Again.
The lawsuit alleges DOGE violates the 1972 Federal Advisory Committee Act (FACA)
I vote that we rename this by switching “Federal” to “Civil.” Then we can sue DOGE for violating CACA. And then I can have one last chuckle before everything burns.
I can’t get past the second paragraph. Mind doing a little copy/paste for us?
Now you just need to find a mouth for it to porron
I prefer that classy pinkeye. I put gold leaf on my gunk sealing my eyelid shut.
What on earth are you Babeling about?
That mom was such a fucking badass, especially with the garbage disposal
If the thumbnail offers any hints, it’s cuz someone in a cool jumper hit it with a 10-lb sledge.
Pssst… Hey, hey buddy! You got and question marks? I just used my last one.
And that his sleep was not disturbed. Simply didn’t wake up from his perspective.
Fuck this is awful…
*Trump signs executive order to rename “camo” to “peekaboo pattern”*