" It’s not fair for the dog or us if we’re just scraping by. But it hurts. "

Yes it hurts, but this is responsible pet ownership in action. You have nothing to reproach yourself if you decline their offer. The fence situation is a deal breaker too imo. And when it comes to strong, solid and consistent training - do you think anyone other than yourself can supply that? And there are so many other calls on your time and effort. What would happen if you or one of the minipeelers got sick? You’re doing the right thing - both for your family and for the dog. There will come a time in the future when the stars all align and its the right time to get a pup. Just not now.