I’m currently sat on the toilet, I guess I’d take it as my queue to go have a shower

Suddenly I’ve had a weekend like in my 20s, but I didn’t have to spend a bunch of money on overpriced cocktails.

The real question is, do I magically end up with a boring, closeted “straight” guy who pumps and runs directly afterwards, or am I just walking home naked? Because depending on how that answers, it’s either a weekend from my early 20s, or my vacation to Mexico a few years back.

Well I’m at work so this is potentially life-altering.

I’d still be naked in bed

I’m in the bathroom, so it wouldn’t affect me much. Would lose a pair of really fluffy pajamas, so that sucks.

Aside from panic at what the fuck just happened, walk to the bedroom, and grab some new clothes

Ugh, first I teleport three feet to the side and no later than 24 hrs I’m suddenly stark naked? It’s going to take a toll on my mental health for sure, but other than that I’ll be really frustrated because I’m wearing my favourite shirt right now

I’m just cold… that’s it…

Really depends on whether that includes the hairties holding my pigtails in place. If the pigtails stay, I think I can still walk out of this sports bar with my dignity intact.